Since my conviction in 2004, I have actively studied the law. I have become an advocate for registrants and prisoners who are having issues with the criminal Justice system. I decided to make a change in the system for me and others.
I was convinced that my life was over as a result of my conviction. Moreover, I sure that I would never find another wife. The reality is that I found a wonderful wife, who supports me, in spite of this conviction. I would not have chosen the advocacy path, but the advocacy path is what made it easier for me to channel my energies and not only help myself but help others as well.
Taking the slow process of getting to the end of my lengthy sentence day by day, really helped me understand that there were a number of issues I needed to work on: patience, compassion, understanding and most of all, tolerance.
I have moved on to become the chairman of my town’s local Water Board, and actively engaged in the local political scene. I am one of two registrants in the town I live in, and nobody has said anything about my past. As a result, I was elected to a position in a local County political organization and on to a position on a State political organization as a representative from the County.
I served 5 years for my crimes. The reality is that one can let the conviction eat away at your soul, as it did for me for a brief period, or we can stand up and say, that is not who I am, that is what I did. It took me a long time to come around to realizing that I am more than my conviction. I am happy with where I landed: helping people, a wonderfully understanding wife, and work that I look forward to everyday.
Congratulations you are a inspiration.
Thank you for going on to help others have hope. Someone I love has spent 18 years being punished for wearing shorts without underwear and only visually offending two adult females. He has to register till 2023. So has a few more years punishment to go. Can’t even sell his house and move to Senior housing in the area he wants because everything is close to a park, school, pool, daycare, etc…..
How can I contact this advocate. My son is now 31. He was charged at the age of 18. His Dna was inconclusive. He was placed on 8 years deferred adjudication. He didn’t make it. He served 2 years and afterward, placed on the registry for lifetime.
Hello Emma,
Tim also happens to be our state contact for Vermont. If you would like to send us an email from here https://narsol.org/contact/ We can put you in touch with him.
I am printing your comment out without your photo or name (hope you don’t mind) for my son to read when he gets out of jail. He is currently in jail for being forced to take a polygraph without his attorney present and he disclosed information that happened years ago VOLUNTARILY (was not asked on polygraph) because he thought it was the right thing to do. We have always thought he was mildly Asperger. Do not know if they can check for that in adults?
Reading your letter will give him hope. He is tough and so far, has not let the registry knock his knees out from under him. Like you, he is very sorry for what he did. Like you said, he did something wrong, but it is not who he is. He is intelligent, likeable, loving, and his life will be wasted away by the state of Ohio because he made a mistake early in his adult life. He will not be off the registry until his early 50’s!
Thank you so much for your words of hope!
Sincerely,
Joy
Tim,
How do I get in touch with you there is no link to you
If you want to reach any of our story-tellers, send a message to contact@narsol.org and we’ll try to connect you. Thanks.
Thank you for sharing your experience and encouragement with us. I am a registered SO, as well, but not ready to share my story. I wish to live a quiet life with the only family member that hasn’t taken advantage of the aftermath of my conviction. My father is disabled from a 20 ft. fall that happened before my conviction. During the time I spent away from my family, deciding to max out my eight year sentence, I realized that my father needed help. I vowed to be there for him. He’s been there throughout my conviction and time spent in prison. I was released back in 2014. I’ve never been able to help my father due to ordinances that prevent me from residing with him. My father and I want to address our local City Hall, but I can’t get any information or support on how to begin. I don’t think it’s humane to prevent my father from receiving the loving care I can give to him. I’ve found out that his address is actually outside of the child safety
Congratulations!There is a young man who desperately needs some help.
https://narsol.org/2018/04/barbaric-consequences-to-show-me-yours-and-ill-show-you-mine-in-a-digital-world/
Read this and then see if there’s anything you can possibly do to help this young man and his family.
Will, thanks for your comment and link. NARSOL often brings these sorts of problems to light, and we work to litigate where we can. We also encourage all of our members to get involved locally to combat the many ill-conceived laws that create situations like this young man’s. We encourage all interested to visit our main site, join NARSOL, and look for ways to participate.
Congratulations on your changed life!! You give me hope for my son who just began a 13 year sentence. I worry myself sick over what kind of life he will have in this world of discrimination towards SO. I am praying these laws change before he is relieased!
Timothy- sounds like you have a life better than many non-registrants! I’m considering trying a career change too and it’s nice to feel some confidence returning. It can be such a soul-corroding experience, if you let it be.
Attitude is everything. Like me, it sounds like you’ve intentionally decided to take a positive attitude. How can anything change unless we believe? Like you, i resent the SO label, because it is not who i am.
Congratulations on finding love. Another person on this site remarked that SO status is a good filter…it takes special people to see beyond labels.
Glad to see a new story posted and that the “humans on the registry” project is still going!
You are a lucky man to have still found love as a registered citizen.